Saturday, August 11, 2007

Spartans! Prepare For FUDGE!

So Steph and I are watching 300 last night (MUCH less impressive not in a big theatre but still plenty of good stuff), and at some point I was unable to remain silent about the intense homoeroticism of it all.

I MEANT to say, "This is kind of a movie for wanna-be fudgepackers." Instead, I said, "This is kind of a movie about fudge."

We both cracked up, and thence was invented the "300 Fudge Game"

Replace words in 300 dialogue with "fudge." Hilarity ensues. I took this show over to the lunatics at Circvs Maximvs and wow. Behold:

"Spartans! Prepare for FUDGE!"

"Spartans! Tonight we dine on FUDGE!"

"Ephialtes, how high can you raise your fudge?"

"Madness? THIS IS FUDGE!!!!"

"Theron, I need your fudge."

"Fudge must be hard. It must be strong. Fudge must be hard and strong."

"A thousand nations of the Persian empire descend upon you. Our fudge will blot out the sun!"
-- "Then we will fight in the fudge."

"You have many slaves, Xerxes. But few warriors. It won't be long before they fear my spears more than your whips."
-- "It's not the lash they fear. It is my fudge. "

"My heart is broken for your loss."
-- "Heart? I have filled my heart with fudge."

"It seems I brought more fudge than you."

"Come back with your fudge, or on it."

"Choose your next fudge very carefully, Leonidas."

"It is not a question of what a Spartan citizen should do, nor a husband, nor a king. Instead, ask yourself, my dearest love, what should a fudge-packer do?"

"Unless I miss my fudge, we're in for one wild night."

"No retreat. No surrender. No fudge."

"You threaten my people with slavery and fudge!"

"Our ancestors built this wall. Using ancient stones from the bosom of Greece herself. And with a little Spartan help, your Persian scouts supplied the fudge."

"His helmet was stifling, it narrowed his vision. And he must see far. His shield was heavy. It threw him off balance. And his fudge is far away."

"Freedom is not free, it requires great sacrifice. The price is paid in fudge."

"Perhaps you haven't noticed, but we've been sharing our fudge with you all morning."

"Give them nothing! But take from them FUDGE!"